“No,” he replied, trying not to laugh at me. “Truffles grow under specific trees, sometimes several different types of trees, like European truffles. They don’t hurt the trees at all. These aren’t worth nearly as much as European truffles, but they make damn fine eating,” he explained. “The ag agent said we might get a hundred dollars a pound if we were lucky,” he continued, grinning.“A hundred!” I exclaimed.“This is about two pounds, and we found these in part of the area where we pulled up the roots of the first tree we cut down. There may be three or four more pounds just under the first tree. With five hundred trees, that’s two thousand pounds of truffles, or almost $200,000,” he said.“Do we use pigs to locate them, or do we have to dig everything up? Will the mulching and watering you do hurt them? How long do they take to regrow, or will they regrow?” I began firing questions at him.“Yes, no, no, don’t know, and yes,” he replied, ticking each answer off on his fingers. I had to. Desert Eagle a gun like that could leave a hole in somebody! Then She asked me "who the fuck are you?" and my response was "I should be asking you the same question bitch! what the fuck you doin in my apartment?" and then she said back to me "fuck you, now get your ass back against the wall." and so I got up against the wall and then she went in my bedroom and so I slowly peaked around the corner this bitch was about to take my rent money and said to myself "fuck this, I ain't fixing to get put out cause of this bitch!" so I grabbed her from behind, managed to get the gun away from her, and right when I was bout to give her a big swing, she screamed fell on the floor face down hands over her head like she was protecting it for dear life and started cryin and I said "what the fuck?" After that started leveling with her with my bat still in my hand. so slowly she looked up to me and I looked at her asked her "before I call the cops, you better explain to me why you broke in my.
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