I would like to look at a wine list, please." Eighteen was the legal drinking age where we lived."I will need to look at your identification," the waiter said to Sally. When she showed him her driver's license, he said, "Yes, indeed. Happy birthday."I took out my driver's license and showed it to the waiter too. "She really is my daughter, I promise."He smiled. "Of course, sir."When the waiter came back with the wine list, I said, "Give it to the birthday girl. She is the guest of honor."Sally looked at the list. After the waiter left, she said, "I don't know anything about wine, Daddy, you choose."I looked at the list, and decided on a bottle of Kendall Jackson cabernet sauvignon. When the waiter returned with a bottle of the wine, two glasses, and an opener, he said, "In honor of your daughter's birthday, this is on the house." Oh, wow, thanks a lot," Sally said giggling.With a great deal of ceremony, the waiter opened the wine glass, and poured a small amount of wine in a glass. It is not uncommon for a gentleman of a certain age, say mine, to have accompany him a young lady, typically his niece or cousin, who, shall I say, is not a blood relation at all. A young lady who works on commission, perhaps? Do you see my meaning?”I blushed slightly but smiled. “Perhaps the relation is more than a friend but less than a wife? Please, Uncle James, such things are not limited to the colonies.” I stressed the ‘Uncle’ heavily, with a wink at Siobhan, and was delighted at his startled look.“Child, you shall be the death of me! Well, since you are so sophisticated, you may know that this fool will almost certainly be bringing a ‘niece’ or ‘cousin’ with him. If he actually had this many female relations, it would be a most astonishing statistical improbability, especially considering he once told me that both he and his parents were only children.” Siobhan and I both giggled at this. “Regardless, I do try to maintain a liberal attitude towards my guests, so we shall treat.
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