She was very weak and sensitive towards me. I figured I've given enough for this girl to absorb and digest from me so I should drop her home and have a few more dates before fucking.I dropped her home.The same night I got another wechat message from Lulu. She was stranded at night because she got off her bus at the wrong bus stop. I didn't know whether she was flirting with me or being serious about being stranded. Anyways, I drove out yet again and found her. She was glad to see me and I felt so much sexual tension. It felt like she wanted to rip me apart.We got back to her place and she invited me in for some soup. I said yes, not for the soup, but for a chance to fuck this girl. I was thinking deeply at this point about something important.If I try to fuck now and Lulu does not let me, she will never see me again, so I should wait right? But what if she wants me now, and I am too scared to make a move, I should not wait right?I drank her soup and it was horrible. But either way. Surprisingly, I didn't mind the sight or the feeling.I showered slowly, taking care to ensure that the smell of cum was gone. As the hot water pelted my shoulders, I knew I had to figure myself out. I was obviously not straight, but not gay. Still, I had to admit I had enjoyed the experience, being ordered to service a man. What was I then?When I returned to the bedroom, Matt had dressed. He invited me to have a drink with him and as it was Saturday, I agreed. He admitted that he had seen my profile change, but he wasn't surprised in the least. He told me that many straight guys feel shame after giving their first blow job. The whole masculinity thing is hard to shake, and it takes time to accept that you enjoy cock. His explanation relieved me, but talking to the man who had just covered my face with his cum was surreal. I wondered what would come next.Matt asked me if I had any other fantasies, and I admitted that I didn't. I had always focused on sucking so the rim job, fingering.
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